ATLANTA, GA – Today a group of theatergoers crammed together in the exit row of a movie theater while they watched an unexpected post-credit scene for the film The Hustle, starring Anne Hathaway and Rebel Wilson.
“The movie ended, so we stood up to leave,” said patron Mary
Wentworth. “We were almost out of the theater when suddenly another scene
started to play. We had to rush back to the screen! You’d expect something like
that from a Marvel movie, but this really caught us off guard.”
Knowing that the scene would only last a minute, the patrons
at the AMC in Phipps Plaza decided not to return to their seats, choosing
instead to gaze at the screen while huddled uncomfortably close to one another in
the mouth of the exit row.
“It was awkward,” Mary continued. “There was suddenly this
giant man standing beside me in a Hawaiian shirt. He had a very powerful musk.
It was so distracting I completely missed the scene.”
Despite everyone having watched the scene, not one of the theatergoers
we spoke to could remember what actually occurred in the scene twenty minutes later,
making the entire experience a waste of time. Though some would argue that
seeing The Hustle in the first place was a waste of time.
“It was a real shitty movie too,” said an anonymous source who did not want it on record that he saw The Hustle. “I honestly have no idea what possessed me to stay. It was 93 minutes of pure torment. Did I really think this last sixty second bit was going to save the entire movie? Did I honestly think that an additional scene of Rebel Wilson being painfully unfunny was going to bring the whole thing home?”
For those sixty seconds the six people who saw the 10:45am showing of The Hustle were bonded to one another. Now they have gone their separate ways, to experience more of this beautiful story that we call life. The six will always have the post-credit scene from The Hustle though.