Beer Hands

Beer Hands comes from a character a friend would periodically portray in college days. Beer Hands has had many different notable professions that required the use of his hands, which were inexplicably beer bottles. He’s held down jobs as a stenographer, construction, paleontology, an electrician etc. How Beer Hands managed to secure any of these particular jobs is a bit of a mystery. I think it’s because he’s so laid back and sipping on his beer hands.

Even though he often drank from his own beer hands, they never seemed too empty. It was a miracle in and of itself. He doesn’t say much — actually he doesn’t speak at all. The only thing he needs to do in order to express his feelings is a simple shrug and a sip from one of his beer hands. He’s gotten far in life mainly because he doesn’t speak, and he’s a great listener. Because that’s all people really want in life — for someone to listen to their bullshit.


Mousebear Comedy is just a couple dudes hiding behind an anthropomorphic mouse and bear in order to purge our shadow through webstuff.

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About The Author


BEAR never met his real dad and was forced to be his own father figure. He spent his time as a child grounding himself or disappointing himself when he missed his t-ball games that he promised himself he would definitely be there for this time. He beat himself up often, metaphorically and literally, so C.P.S. came and took him away from himself. At this point BEAR discovered that he could see in the dark, but only if he spent several minutes letting his eyes adjust first. BEAR is also a Capricorn and loves long crabwalks on the beach.

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